The LBDDiaries.com Blog

**WARNING-WARNING**

**LOUD OBNOXIOUS BIRTHDAY MUSIC **

*CLICK ON LITTLE RIGHT ARROW TO GO TO NEXT SONG*

OR 

*JUST TURN IT DOWN OR PAUSE IT ON PLAYER* 

Yep.  It is my big bad-boy Alpha Hubby’s birthday today (November 23rd).  He’s the big $*#& – what? You thought I was going to tell you?  No, no.  I value my life a wee bit too much.  But it’s a B*I*G* one – B*I*G*.  H*U*G*E*.  A milestone.  One that I would love to razz him about but… mine is coming so I have to be good.  Oh, it’s not that bad.  I just had to slightly razz him.  He’d wonder what I was up to if I didn’t do a little bit.  Oh, OK – I’ll tell you.  He’s 18.

17 years 8 months and 19 days ago, Alpha Hubby and I were married.  It has been an amazing journey and I am so grateful to be sharing this walk with him.  I put 18 candles on his cake because as far as I’m concerned, his life wasn’t worth *bupkis until he met me.  Otay?  Otay!

It sure has been full of wonder.  Through the not so nice slightly tight times, amazing times, better and best times, I’m so glad it’s been with you.  Wowzers, baby! 

So Alpha Hubby, for your birthday, I’m putting 13 songs on the Player just for you (list below).  Some of them are your favorites.  Some are just silly birthday ditties.  Any of them you don’t wanna hear, just click on the next song, turn it down by using the slider and your mouse, or turn it off by clicking on the Arrow (which pauses it).  Some (like Bad to the Bone) can get obnoxious so you can just go to the next song!  A couple are… not nice.  They are supposed to be funny.

You already know what you’re getting for your birthday (sly grin).  Hurry home and unwrap me… oh, errr, um, it!  Unwrap IT.  And this time your cake might have more than one shredded carrot in it, but I can’t promise.

And I’m really glad you’re bad to the bone, just for me.  You make everything groovy.

—————————

*bupkis (uncountable) – absolutely nothing; nothing of value, significance or substance

List of Songs

– # Title Artist –

1 Bad To The Bone George Thorogood

2 A Happy Happy Birthday Song Arrogant Worms (really strange song)

3 Seven Spanish Angels Willie Nelson

4 Little Red Riding Hood Sam The Sham & The Pharaohs

5 Your Man Josh Turner

6 Come a Little Bit Closer Marty Robbins

7 I’d Love To Lay You Down Conway Twitty

8 I’m A Believer The Monkeys

9 Wild Thing The Troggs

10 You Don’t Mess Around With Jim Jim Croce

11 Go with Me Josh Turner

12 Stuck On You Lionel Richie

13 Happy Twistin’ Birthday Big Daddy

Sometimes songs are so perfect.  Someone else wrote the words and music, but they perfectly describe what you are trying to say about or to someone.

I can see it in your eyes
You’ve had a long day
Let’s lock the doors
Pull down the shades
Turn some music on
Pour a glass of sweet, red wine
Let the candles burn
Put your hand in mine

One thing Alpha Hubby loves to do is slow dance.  It is very romantic to put on music and slow dance in the kitchen… dining room… living room.  Anywhere the impulse hits one of us.  He is a very romantic man.  He was far more romantic when we met than I was, but I’m learning, more and more.

Dance with me,
Don’t say a word, just dance with me.
Let the world outside disappear,
Baby, what we got here
Is all we need
Dance with me

It’s so funny because as most of you know when we met, he really didn’t know how to dance.  I told the story of how he wanted to be able to dance with me at an office party we had to attend.  If not, it’s HERE (if you do it now, be sure and pause the song otherwise it will play on the other page, too).  Alpha Hubby was such a smooth slow dancer than evening.  We didn’t want to do anything else – just dance to the slow ones.  I know we fogged up the floor.

I kiss you goodbye
In the early morning light
Sometimes I don’t get home
’till it’s cold and dark outside
But baby here we are
we’re together all alone
We’ve finally found a moment
We can call our own

He leaves early to go to work and gets home late, 12-13 hours later.  Every morning, he kisses me goodbye.  He quit for awhile a few years back and my days just didn’t go right.  I told him he can’t neglect me like that.  It is an addiction to me, being awakend by his kiss.  Since then, he’s never ever forgotten.

Dance with me,
Don’t say a word, just dance with me
Let the world outside disappear
Baby, what we got here is all we need

Those times when we dance, we really are alone, in a cocoon and the world outside disappears.  What we have together is all we need.  He always tells me that if we lived in the middle of 1000 acres, we’d be fine with only one another.  He works to make us work.  He is always looking to better himself for me.  He is my best friend.  He is the only one who has my best interests in mind at all times.   He is a gift from God.

He loves me.  He wants to dance with me.  I am thankful.

So the other day Alpha Hubby and I were having one of our deep, important discussions.  Oh OK, truth is, I was talking and he was pretending to listen intently.  He’s really good at that.

I was telling him about an author of the romantic suspense novel I was reading (oh and you know this was of burning interest to him).  I explained how I really liked that the author carried main characters over into each subsequent novel.  One set of characters you meet in one novel will show up in a small way in the next novel.  This is especially nice if you liked the characters and wonder what happened to them.

What I really liked about the author, I explained, was that she showed the previous couples as still being passionate toward one another, even after time has passed, and even after having children.  The couple would still sneak off in the middle of a party to lock themselves into the library for a little tryst.  They still looked at one another across a crowded room.  They still held hands and still made time for one another.  They still carried on as if they were madly in love.

He grunted a “huh” to show he was listening.  He’s good at that, too.

“It’s really nice even if it is just fiction,” I went on, “because it seems that in real life so many women are busy putting their children and everything else first.  They have a baby and don’t come up for air for 17 years.  It is as if the husband doesn’t exist anymore except as an afterthought.   Sometimes on a blog, I’ll check their ‘About Me’ section just to see if they are even married.   You’re always first in my life and Alpha Son came out okay.  He knew he was well and totally loved by both of us.  Wonder why so many women make that mistake?”

He said, “Well, I’m sure their men are in the background somewhere, hoping to be noticed again someday.  Hoping they might be going to get some somehow, somewhere, some day.  Thinking maybe they’ll be first again.”

“Um, yes, exactly.”

Leave it to Alpha Hubby to get to the bottom line of most men’s thought process.

“Well anyway,” I continued, “that is why I like this author.  She always shows the characters as maintaining the passion and love, putting one another first.  What’s so funny is that people think this isn’t real – that this type of love really is fiction.  They act like you can’t sustain the passion and romantic attitude after being married for awhile.  They act like things like that are unrealistic.  Yet we do it.”

“Well, that’s because we are unrealistic.”  He then grinned at me.

“I never thought about that, but you may be onto something.  We are unrealistic according to some people.  Oh, they make the excuses like, ‘well, your kid is out of the house now’ or ‘you only had one kid’ or whatever…”

He interrupts, “That is just an excuse.  People make excuses when something isn’t important to them.”

“You’re right.” 

“And besides,” he continues, “I’m gonna be first in your life or else.  You got that, woman!?”

*Sigh* I love when he goes all Neanderthal on me.

The rest of the conversation really should be taken behind closed doors.  No peeking!

Whatever Lola Wants, Lola Gets.   Well, I guess I should say “Whatever Nan Wants, Nan Gets.”

This wasn’t always true.  As a matter of fact, I can say with a straight face that I never got anything I wanted until Alpha Hubby.  He broke the curse.

Once I got out on my own, I was able to date, go to class (or not), screw up, and make it or not by my own choices.  I did fairly well with the exception of dating.  Without fail, I had one thing “wrong” with me that chased away every guy I ever dated.

I was raised that you did not have sex until after marriage.  So if I declared “I won’t have sex with you”, it was see-ya-wouldn’t-wanna-be-ya with every guy.  E.V.E.R.Y. guy, without fail.  Oh, some took it as a challenge so I learned the difference between a date and a wrestling match.  I also made a lot of male friends (i.e. if I wouldn’t sleep with them, they would hang around because they liked me but went off to plow greener umm – pastures). 

And that was just college!  Even guys after that seemed to think there was something wrong with me because I wouldn’t fall into bed with them at the drop of a drink, jewel or promise.

I’ve lived a lot like that old Linda Ronstadt song (When Will I Be Loved):  I’ve been cheated, been mistreated, been put down, been pushed round, when I met a new man that I wanted for mine, he always broke my heart in two every time, been made blue, and been lied to.  On top of that, I’ve lived in fear, been involved with Mr. Evil and his twin brother Mr. Psycho, been part of a drama that made soap operas look tame, had to get over some pretty nasty stuff, AND made a decision I was NEVER going to love or get married again, ever, never, ever.

For a long time, I was single, alone, and at peace.  My home was exactly the same way when I got home at night as it was when I left that morning – completely and totally peaceful.  No one bellowing.  No one criticizing.  No one cheating, bleating or fleeting. 

But I also never knew what true and unconditional love was.  I never had It.  I never had faithfulness.  That breath-taking knowing that he was never going to cheat, bleat or be fleeting!  I never knew what it was like to be at total ease with someone, without pretending.  I never laughed without worrying about how I sounded or looked, I never had freedom from makeup, never had passion that was real, or been given everything I wanted.

Then came him. 

Then Lola got everything she wanted.  Literally, physically, spiritually and emotionally.  I not only met a guy who was willing to hold out until after we were married, respecting what I wanted, he also understood it to the point he took the decision as his own, too.  Thank goodness we only had 7 weeks before we got married. “Nuff said on that.

I discovered I was married to a man who would, with every breath in his body, try to give me anything and everything my heart desires.  He still does.  I have to be very careful what I desire.  Some women would take advantage of a man with such a big heart like that.

He cooks, cleans, builds, works, puts me first and himself last, creates anything I need to make my life easier, and he would die for me.  And yes, he would kill for me if it required that to protect me.  He is an old fashioned man, opening doors, walking on the curb side, and always in protection mode. 

He is a throwback to another era where knights in shining armor took the lady’s favor before they went into battle.  He would slay dragons for me (and has).  He is stubborn, domineering, dominating, passionate about what he believes in, and absolutely 100 percent hates to be questioned when he knows he is right, even if it is just for information and not to say “you are wrong.”

Living with him is sometimes not easy – I am also stubborn, domineering, dominating, passionate about what I believe in, and absolutely 100 percent want to be acknowledged when I am right about something he thinks I know nothing about.  But because of his huge heart, we are able to have much more peace in our home than battles.  Even the first “adjustment” year of giving together.  Hey that’s a great typo – giving together.  I meant living together but what we did was give!

Whatever Lola wants, Lola gets – and baby, what she wants is YOU.  The lyrics say it all:

Whatever Lola wants, Lola gets
And little man, little Lola wants you.
Make up your mind to have
No regrets
Recline yourself
Resign yourself, you’re through

I always get what I aim for
And your heart and soul
Is what I came for

Whatever Lola wants, Lola gets
Take off your coat
Don’t you know you can’t win
You’re no exception to the rule
I’m irresistible, you fool… give in
Give in, you’ll never win

Whatever Lola Wants (Lola Gets) Ella Fitzgerald

One thing that strengthens my relationship with Alpha Hubby is his sense of humor and patience.  Hmm – I guess that is two things.  And boy, does he need them both because without them we wouldn’t have what we have now.

We had the benefit of knowing God was up to something when we met.  Knowing that, I believe, gave us an extra added “bump” to protect our marriage from the known danger factors.  You know factors such as eating my special cashews.

Oh, you would think this is no big deal but Alpha Hubby is a dirty low down rotten scoundrel thief.  Yeah you heard me, baby – YOU are a dirty low down rotten scoundrel thief.  

His thievery started out the first year we were married.  He stole an innocent child’s chicken strips.  That is a story for another day but suffice it to say, Alpha Son still talks about his chicken strips 16 years later.

Now the cashew issue is one that still bugs me to this day.  Oh yeah, sure I’ve forgiven him and generally forgotten about it.  Then I will see a container of beautiful whole cashews and the memory jumps on me again, taking me to places I shouldn’t go.  Places of revenge.  Of getting even.

The story goes like this.  Once upon a time, a friend sent me these unbelievably huge whole cashews knowing how much I liked them.  There were very few in the specialty store container but oh so delish looking.  I can drag out big cashews like that – eating a couple here and there, savoring every bite for weeks!  They had also sent English walnuts for Alpha Hubby.  Got that?  Cashews for me, English walnuts for him.

After gouging a small hole in the plastic covering and digging out a couple of cashews, I set the container on the countertop.  I gave Alpha Hubby his walnuts.  I don’t remember what I wandered off to do but I wasn’t gone THAT long.  I always had those cashews in the back of my mind, salivating.

The next time I went into the kitchen, I decided to get another cashew.  To my horror, the container was EMPTY.  I am quite afraid that I emitted a rather… unladylike BELLOW.  “WHERE ARE MY CASHEWS??”

It wasn’t as if I didn’t know being that we were the only two at home.  He came into the dining room, looked at the empty container, looked at my flushed (and not from s*x) face and knew he was doomed.

I truly hesitate to tell you what he said.  But he swears he wasn’t misbehaving and that it wasn’t him or his fault or… but give me a break.  He had salt on his lips and cashews on his breath.

Misbehaving.  And playing that innocent “who me?” surprised-that-I’d-suspect-him look combined with “uh oh, busted” look.  I can’t tell you how many times he’s done this in our marriage.  He really is a dirty low down rotten scoundrel thief.   And NO I don’t mark out the words this time.  Scoundrel.

Lessons I had to learn in our marriage:  Don’t leave anything in the fridge that I want to eat later.  Not without making him look me in the eyes (to ensure he really heard me) and threatening his life if he touches it.  Don’t leave the last best favorite bite on my plate and look away or get up from the table.  It won’t be there when I return.  Oh blah blah blahdy blah.

Let’s just cut to the chase.  Don’t leave any food or drink anywhere near him and actually think it will be there if I leave the room and come back.  Or look away to talk to someone.  It is gone in 10 seconds.  It always makes him feel so superior to steal my food even if I sort of sneakily let him, to keep from overeating.   He doesn’t know that.  Oh.  Guess he does now, huh?

But does he share?  I DON’T THINK SO.  Not only is he a dirty low down rotten scoundrel thief, he is also a stingy slick-willy greedy guts who doesn’t share his own food.  Case in point?  His organic peanut butter.

The other night, he was contentedly sitting at the table eating some bread and peanut butter.  He guards his peanut butter like it is gold.  If he leaves to get some milk, he always looks as me suspiciously when he comes back to see if I took a bite of his bread (I don’t… unless he’s already taken a bite and may not notice if some was nibbled off that area).  Oh.  I guess he knows that now, too.  Huh.

So the other day, I flat out tried to steal his coated up bread.  He fought me off.  So I gave up and leaned in to kiss him.  He put his hand up and stopped me, declaring:

“Stop!  You’re just trying to get secondhand peanut butter.”

Greedy guts.  How did he know?

.

At least he ain’t misbehavin’ with my heart!

Count Basie, Ain’t Misbehavin (Recorded 1959)

I just read this really good post over at Aesha Online pointing out how few people go into marriage with “forever” in mind.  Go check it out – it’s a great post!

Anyway, it got me to thinking about – who else?  Alpha Hubby and forever.  Many of you know I waited twelve (12!) l-o-o-o-n-g, celibate years for Alpha Hubby.  I wasn’t about to give it up for anything less than forever (and AFTER the wedding).  I’d made a vow to myself. 

And as you know we M*A*G*I*C*A*L*L*Y married 7 weeks later… NOT.  Oh, we did get married 7 weeks later but there wasn’t anything magicical about it.   Well, I lie.  The part where Alpha Hubby and Alpha Son made vows as father and son was pretty awesome and I cried.  But I was shaking in my heels.   I was so a-feart!  Sure, I believe God put us together but that doesn’t mean hoards of past memories didn’t rise up and try to overtake me.  I was almost ready to walk away.

Now fast forward 17.7 years later and I scoff – scoff, I tell you – at my fear.  How was I to know that God actually knew what He was doing?  I know!   Alpha Hubby is truly my prince – my knight in shining armor – my first and last and only true love.  He wasn’t even a frog in disguise.  He is what he was then, only better now.  And boy, am I glad. 

We made a committment the day we married.  We were in this forever (or else).  We didn’t leave any loopholes where we (he) could squirm out.  But I still remember when we were first married I’d say things like, “If you ever cheat on me, that’s it.  I’m outta here.”  He’d agree that this sounded reasonable.  Of course that was fear talking.

About eight months into the marriage, all that drastically changed.  We knew one another better.  We (I) developed more trust.  We were positive divine intervention had put us together.  He came up to me one day and said, “I changed my mind.  If you ever cheat, I will hunt you down.  I will take you out.  We’re in this together, forever.”  How cute!  My husband was going to be stalking me!  All in the name of love.  Awwww.

Hmm.  Something tells me finding that romantic is wrong somehow.   But by golly, if loving him for that is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.  (Snicker)

So now I know that when you make a committment with no loopholes, even when that burning heart means indigestion rather than passion, you are committed to one another (and will find that passion again).  It means a security that can’t be developed any other way.  It means you work together, facing the world hand in hand, ready to take on monsters and bury them.  He slays dragons regularly for us.  I protect our intimacy. 

We can fight without fear but we hate fighting so work hard not to.  No loopholes means we can fight without that “Uh oh, we’re heading for divorce” feeling.  It means “OK, let’s find a way around this difference.”  After some door slamming, cup throwing, immature actions (me) and sulking, brooding quietness (him).  THEN we work on the differences to create an equitably suitable and agreeable compromise… 

I’m right and he’s wrong.  The end.

He has NO choice.

Heh. Heh. Heh.

Suck up time:  Baby?  Tonight?  In the bedroom?  Candles?  Romantic music?  Clothing optional?

*Actual note written last night on paper towel.

Let’s Get It On, Marvin Gaye

I’ve been blessed to have many loves in my life.  I realize one shouldn’t talk about past loves when currently involved, but I must.  It is such a wonderful day and I’ve been thinking about the past.  I’m sure Alpha Hubby will understand.  Not.

My first love was not quite as tall as I’d have liked, but he was so handsome.  He had black hair with some white – distinguished.  I remember that because of him, I was able to sleep better at nights.  He made me feel safe.  He was with me a long time.  I loved him so passionately.  Things fell apart rather suddenly.

The second love in my life was amazing.  I loved rubbing my hands over that skin that was as soft as a baby’s butt.  Loved to pose which was fun.  Really, the fact my clothes fit wasn’t a problem.  There was a moving accident that broke my heart.

My third love was so plush.  I was so impressed with how soft the hair was.   I can’t tell you how often I ran my fingers through that soft, blonde hair.  I never forgot that one but have no idea where it all fell apart.  Few people remember now, which is hard for me.

My fourth love – yes, yes, I was a wild child and got around when I was young and in my youth.  Don’t judge me.  It IS all in the past.  My fourth love talked a lot and was kind of a pig – he ate all the time.  I cut him a lot of slack because his mom had been killed with he was a baby.  He was such a wild thing, and eventually left me.  He loved running around in the woods.  I was a city slicker.  It was doomed.

My fifth love – oh, what a little doll he was.  I just knew we’d be together forever.  He left me after 17 years but life was so worth living because he was in it. 

My sixth and last love was the best of them all.  He has all the best attributes of my former loves but has the distinct benefit of being just right for me.  He loves me unconditionally and I know he won’t fall apart on me, have his head dented in a moving box, be a rare stuffed character from a movie, and even if he talked too much or ate like a pig, he won’t chew holes in my window screen or leave me to go scamper in the woods.  He loves me forever.

1 – 1950/60’s teddy bear that eventually literally disintergrated in the late 1970’s.  They were about 24” tall – great for a little girl to cuddle, hold on to and hide from the thunder storms.

 2 – Life-sized vinyl baby doll – the movers were a bit sloppy on one of our major Army moves (Germany to USA), right after I got the doll for Christmas.  Broke my heart but I adapted to the dent in her face.  She was soft – vinyl is!  I got this picture online – otherwise she’d have my baby clothes on.

3 – In 1962 the movie Gay Purr-ee came out – oh, I fell in love with that movie.  I was given the Mewsette cat doll by my Aunt; my first truly plush and very, very soft stuffed animal.  My brother received Meowrice – I don’t know why he didn’t receive the hero – but we all know we like the bad boy better!!  The dolls are apparently so rare, I couldn’t even find a picture of one online to share with you.  Have no idea what happened to that doll.

4 – When we lived in Maryland, dad had gone into the basement and discovered the neighbor’s cat had killed a chipmunk and cornered it’s baby.  “Chippy” lived with us for almost 2 years.  He moved with us to Arkansas (which is where he began chewing on the window screens).   Chippy needed to be free to run wild and a family trip ensued with much tears and heartache.  That chipmunk went nuts in its cage when we got to the woods.  As soon as that cage door was opened, all we saw was his little butt disappearing into the woods.  Thankless.

5 – My fifth love is elf-explanatory – of course he left me after 17-18 years (somewhere in there) – it was his destiny.  He had to grow up and be a man.  He’s still mad at me for selling the Camaro.  “You knew you had a boy, Mom. A boy. A boy who would want your yellow Camaro.  You have no idea how much that one costs nowdays IF it’s even running.  What were you thinking?”

6 – Ahh, my last love (and truth be known, my first since I never really knew what love was before him).  This is my true forever love.  Baby? You really are my first, my last, my everything and I’m so glad  you’re with me!  Thank you for asking me to share your adventures with you ’cause I’m having a blast.

Let’s Stay Together, Al Green

(After post: Some people have asked to hear this song again; since I change songs each post, I offer you the You Tube live version of Francine Reed singing “Wild Women Don’t Get the Blues.”  She’s a powerful singer!)

You’ll have to pardon me here for a minute.  I have to take a little side trip back to before I met Alpha Hubby.  Part of it helps one to understand why he was so impressed with me when we met (his words, not mine).  He *said* he liked my strength.

The song you hear playing is sung by Francine Reed (with Lyle Lovett’s band).  That woman sings so strongly, you just want to jump up and yell, “Me, too!”  I’ve wanted to use this song in a post since forever!

Most of you know that I wasn’t in a relationship for the 12 years before Alpha Hubby came along and tied me down so I couldn’t get away.  He wanted to sweep me off my feet (which would have been much simpler), but no.  No, I spent time wondering where his axe was, when the other shoe was going to drop, or if he would suddenly change from the seemingly nice guy he was into some macho-chest-beating brute.

Now because I still had baggage out the wazoo, you might think I was a spineless wimp back then.  You might think I wasn’t going out because I didn’t have offers or was skeert.  You might think I was too hurt and burned out to ever date again.  You would be thinking wrong.

I was a Wild Woman. 

Oh, wait before you get the wrong idea.  I don’t mean I “ran around at night” and “drank all the Courvoisier I could find” – I was a single parent, working long hours and I didn’t drink. 

This song says a Wild Woman never gets the blues.  That a Wild Woman is strong, will tell any man to go to h-e-double hockey sticks if that man “don’t know how to act right” – wild women will be “the first ones to learn how to fly” – THEY DON’T SIT AROUND WAITING.  I decided life is just fine and I could dance by myself!

Now sure, for me there were some trust issues that had to be dealt with but MOST of them were gone by the time my baby came along.  Besides, some issues couldn’t be dealt with until I was in that situation again.  It’s like walking in love toward others.  I don’t really know if I have that down or not, until it is challenged and tested.  Let someone come along and cut me off in traffic and see how well ingrained my love walk is!  Or talk trash about my man (fist city, baby)!

I am a Wild Woman.  In those twelve years before Alpha Hubby, I spent time healing.  I learned why I was attracted to the wrong type of person.  I figured out why I allowed some man to treat me badly and then let him keep on doing that after he was gone through memories, nightmares and fear.  I cried.  I mourned. I ranted, raved, screamed, and kicked my own bootie.  I read books, prayed, forgave, and let go of the past.  

I found my Inner Wild Woman – that confident woman I used to be.

Wild Women are strong.  I learned that I am SOMEBODY and I have a right to be treated with respect, dignity, honor, and as if I am valuable and precious.  Wild Women don’t let some guy walk all over them.  There was never again going to be a “trifling husband” and I got rid of the “no good friends”!  I never got the blues again because I made a decision to enjoy my life to the fullest right where I was.

I learned that if someone didn’t respect me, they never got time in my space.  I learned the value of slapping that hand up, palm out, in their face, and saying, “STOP!”  Stop because you don’t deserve me.  Stop because I am never putting up with that again.  Stop because I am special and if you don’t treat me that way, I am flat out NOT interested in you.  Stop because if you don’t treat me right, I’m outta here.  I DON’T HAVE TO PUT UP WITH ANYONE DISRESPECTING ME ever again.

I am a Wild Woman.  I learned to respect myself.  I learned my worth.  I learned that I am OK just the way I am and I don’t HAVE to change before I’m worthy of someone’s love. 

Then one day at work, along came this guy I barely knew.  He thought I was somebody special.  He was in awe of me (boy, has THAT changed).  He was gentle, patient, and kind to the point I said to him, “I’m not sure I know what to do with a nice guy!”  I mean, really – what was the matter with him?  He was treating me right!  Too foreign for my ability to comperhend.

Of course, NOW I know he is a reformed bad boy and he is dominating, aggravating, pushy, challenging, likes to get his way, hates to be told what to do, is very confident in himself (but not conceited), gets mega cranky when he’s tired, and would walk all over me IF I let him.  He likes that I don’t let him… at least he said that to me when we were first married.  He tends to forget that now (*ahem*).  I love him wildly and strongly.

Wild women: we don’t ever worry.  Wild women never, never get the blues!  His very strength helps me be stronger.  He loves me passionately.  He loves me just the way I am.  He loves me completely.  He loves me enough that I can let go and not be strong sometimes.

Strong Men love Wild Women.  Wildly and Strongly.

Wild Women Never Get The Blues